The Crew, a group of slandered individuals that do not fit in in today's society. Yet they all click so well when together. Much like a puzzle that cannot be put together simply because all the pieces are mixed from several different puzzles. For one may challenge the other to a game of Russian Roulette but the other always manages to discharge the final bullet upon themselves or the challenging opponent might simply jump in the way of the charging round.

Daria mi vida por ti.

Like arsenic bruises my stupidity burns me on the inside. Surely they will not read this only because of the simple fact that this is too long or because they could care less for what I have to say. But through thick and thin we really should not be apart, honestly I never would have known we could be so in sync with one another but even books get torn sometimes. I would have to say we are all a bit scrutinizing in our own little ways, but with such actions to ourselves we are all right. Even as I, who might have been mistaken to be wronged I still felt in my opinion that I was right when in reality I am wrong, for that I apologize. Surely none of you will ever read this simply because you are positively mad at me for my decisions or for things that I have done.

Lo siento.



For my honesty and the fact that I cannot keep secrets, but why should I? Aren't we all at a stage where we should all know everything? Hasn't it been made a fact that we cannot tell a lie? So why should I? Why should I not settle a problem? But instead I am told to let it boil over in a cauldron that has sat on the stove for way too long. But you see, when I make such preferential ideas to confirm my feelings I am told I have wronged badly and must be contained within myself.

No puedo hacer esto sola.

I have been told that lately I beat myself up too much, but does this too not add to reasons as to why I shouldn't call myself a bad person? A bad friend? I am indeed one bad apple and I feel you shan't not know of someone like me, I feel as though I can only make things worse when I think I am to make things better. I can't ever tell anyone what I am thinking out loud because I am lectured for having such intentions. Therefore I have written this. And even if none of you read this, it can't be said that I didn't say anything.

Perdoname.

For this is my punishment for having such a big mouth: bloody sutures that hurt my lips so badly. With blood and tears mixed on the carpets and the floors, I promise not to speak anymore. I promise not to say what I am thinking or do what I am thinking because if I do it will only end tragically and once again I will lose everything. Like I told you before, I felt like I was going to lose something, isn't it crazy that what I was going to lose was all of you? Its ridiculous.

Quiero la paz.

Its ridiculous. Just down right senseless and stupid. We shouldn't be fighting. None of us. There shouldn't be tension between any of us. Sure you all might say that I am ridiculous for saying this but its true. True friendship crosses all boundaries and even over thin ice all problems will be forgotten and seen through.

Dejenme decirles... Necesito a todos.

Truly I don't know what I'd do if I lost everything. I can't cry because I know I'll see this through, the only problem is if you all will see this through too. I've been so down in the dumps lately the pain is really just that bad. I can't sleep tight because I'm too frightened that when the morning comes I will return to having nothing. The sun has burned a happy hole in my heart but since it is a hole I feel so empty. So hollow. Don't read this and laugh at my words even though I know you probably will and say I am full of shit. But you know what? I truly mean every single one.

Te necesito.

I need you all.

I'm so sorry.